Intersection of the Crossroads of Maturation

I had a little time on my hands, so I decided to go through my old photos that I was able to salvage on my defunct hard drive and I came across this photo. I had a little fun with it on photoshop to edit it to show what my mindset is right now:


March has quickly come and gone and I'm now in April, theoretically the last month before finals. How quick was it that this semester has passed; not too long ago I was taking the tube to Bank to go to a "Seeing London's Architecture" class in London. I really do miss those days, as I had much less to worry. Everyday was Carpe Diem, a new adventure. But even if that was merely half a year ago (already? Amazing) I feel so much older, so much more overwhelmed. The nature of studying abroad gives you a fantastic opportunity to become young again, to have no worries and to escape from everything that you were tied up in and live for the moment.

Now that I'm back here things have arisen and have hit me hard like a brick wall. In a little over a month I will have finished my third year in NYU. High School feels like such a distant memory, and I feel a much different person having come out to the city and lived for three years. Some things have changed about myself, some things haven't. Looking at myself now I ask myself whether I would have expected myself to be where I am now when I was stepping out of my door moving into my freshman dorm for the first time. Have I grown as a person? Have I expanded my mental intellect not just in academics, but through experience and interacting with new things, people, and environments? Have I made my parents hopeful for the person that I will become?

People continuously told me that you need to enjoy your time in college, because it is truly the best four years of your life. I was apprehensive to believe them to start, but looking back on it now I can not agree more. College gives you the pallete with unlimited colors to paint your own picture on any medium. You are given the chance to live independently without having to worry about the extraneous expenses and costs that come with it. But as I slowly realise that my time in Eden is slowly drawing to an end, I have to look forward and see where the journey I have set leads me.

I am hearing back from American Express soon (hopefully, bearing no unfortunate fallacies I can not foresee) about my projects that I get to select for this coming summer. The more I dwell on it the more I realize that my summers are starting to evolve into the once blissful escapes of academia to the limited opportunity presented to me to shine. The difference between the two are startling. The summer after senior year of high school my biggest worry was wondering which sandwich deli to hit for lunch. Now its wondering if my performance earns me enough creditbility to be considered for full-time. The circumstances have changed, but I don't feel like the game has.

This leads back to the picture above. It was a picture that I took during the World Cup Finals in Berlin. France was playing against Italy and the game went into sudden death penalty kicks. Grosso is setting up the ball for the kick that eventually hands the trophy to the Azzurri. The kick that he took defined the person he was for the entire tournament, for his entire career. He could have been the David Trezeguet, who missed his kick when it hit the crossbar and gave Italy the smallest window required to win the match. Grosso scored the game winner against Germany to send his team to the finals, and here he was again required to make the spot kick. Relating to myself I feel like I am coming into crossroads into this kind of situation. If I am given the ball, what will I do with it? What actions will I partake that define me? Will I be the one that slots it in side left corner, or the one that lets his opportunity slip away? This summer I feel will be a huge defining point in my life, not just for the fact that this is the first job that I have found on my own, interviewed on my own (with some prepping from fellow friends and family), and received on my own. Not just for the fact that this is the first time I'll be working away from California, away from home. Not just for the fact that I will be eventually/hopefully making more money than I have in the last 19 years combined. But ultimately, the fact is that I've been given all the tools necessary to become truly independent, to become an adult, to be able to truly define myself outside the realm of my parents.

I've got only one more year of college left, what will I do with it? What can I say is the best thing I got out of college? Was academics the most important thing that I got out of everything? I don't know, and I'm at a point in my life where I really don't know what will happen next. I am anxious to work, to test out what its like working in "the real world" if there is one. I am hungry to learn what it requires to live independently. I want to know what it takes to be self-sufficient.


Am I ready? I have no idea. But all I know is that if I get the golden ball like Grosso did, I sure as hell hope I know what to do to make the best of my opportunity.

After much struggle, it has finally arrived.

Well, after much struggle, hard drives crashing, re-editings and importings and such, I have been able to release episode one of Green Street TV. I've been working with these guys, trying to help them out and get their name across the videoweb. They are the guys that I respect, trying to create good music that really relates with people's minds right now. They aren't just any other group, they are able to blend good beats with really thought out lyrics. So, TC&W Productions is back, and eager to bring you more episodes from the Green Street Crew.

Green Street TV: Episode One Part One (HD)


Part Two (HD)



Hope you guys enjoy it, will be bringing episode 2 soon as I make a quick trip up to Boston hopefully.

Consolation in Living in Minimal Resources

Well, my hard drive failed on me this past spring break, so my luck with electronics this semester has been quite poor, but what can you do. There comes a point where you can't mope about the 360GB of data that you lost (I hate Mac) and all the music/video/photos you try to restore (I hate Seagate), and just have to move on. Shame that my video project got lost, but I'm going to pull off one of those TC&W, Senior Video marathon sessions back in the days of high school.

If anything, I've learned a couple things from this experience. One is to always, always, back up your data because you don't know what can happen. Second is that, fortunately I recovered my photos and music, and my videos are salvaged back home, but you know, there are other things to be fretting about, but this is not one. Its sunny outside, I am enjoying my time with good people, thats all that matters, everything else is marginal.

Anyway, I managed to take some pictures in my time off, enjoy. They're all a little bit photoshopped, turned out pretty nice I think. And video will be up soon I PROMISE.

Music Sample for the Upcoming Release

Here's a tidbit on what I've been working on so far. This is a 16-Bar that my dude A-live dropped for the upcoming episode of Green Street TV. Check them out at their blog, or their myspace page. Check it out, all green street videos will be in HD, so remember to change the settings for optimal viewing pleasure.

Conclusion of Extreme Hypertension and Overexertion of Emotion

I got an offer today, from American Express to work under them over the summer in their Open Division, which works with Small Businesses. I am relieved, and overcome with various emotions that this is all I can write before I scream in the computer lab with joy.


P.S. My computer is broken, I want it back soon and when that is up, I can finally put up that video I've been meaning to edit.

25 Facts

Due to pure popularity and pressure.

1. The mere fact that I'm doing this points out that I am a complete sucker into peer pressure, as after constant tags in other notes I have finally accepted the fact I can be an outlier no more.
2. For a while in college I was known as "the guy that always wears hoodies" and "the bagel kid".
3. I wear my rainbows everywhere, in snow, rain, and extreme hotness.
4. I have this weird permeation of heat that comes out of my hands, and therefore people like to grab them when its cold outside.
5. I used to think the reason why I never got tanned was because I only ate Vanilla and not Chocolate, until I ate Chocolate and realized that it was all lies.
6. I don't cross my eyes anymore in fear of what my mom said when I was 6 that my eyes will stay that way if I do it for too long.
7. I clean out the bowl of rice at every dinner because I was told for every kernel remaining would be a zit on my face - apparently that doesn't really work because I have blemishes the size of craters.
8. My dad tried really hard to get me into tennis, which included dragging me out to the courts on Saturdays. I hated it and gave up after 2 weekends, my dad was really upset.
9. I played violin for 10 years, and I never got past Suzuki book 5. I have forgotten how to read music.
10. When I was in 7th grade I went to Taco Bell and ate Two Gorditas, a Chicken Soft Taco, and a Burrito. I felt a sense of accomplishment until my sister called me a fat ass.
11. I went through a phase where all the music I listened to had to include someone screaming in the chorus. See: System of a Down, Linkin Park (before they sucked), Powerman 5000, Slipknot
12. I had a mushroom bowl cut for 5 years, and I rocked it. I was finally pressured into getting it cut when I was the last kid in school to still have it in 7th grade.
13. One time in sixth grade I let out a huge fart in class when I bent down trying to pick up a pencil. I was sitting behind a girl that I liked, she never talked to me again.
14. One time in 5th grade a girl peed in her pants during a test. The teacher made us swear that no one outside the classroom would know of it. By break the entire 5th grade knew - you're welcome.
15. On that note, one time in summer camp when I was 8 I was in DZ Zone going through the obstacle course and ball pits. I peed myself in my pants while crawling through the tubes, and passed through 4 girls with a trail of pee behind me.
16. I really enjoy cooking, I use it to compensate for my lack of gift-giving, and ideas for gifts. I watch cooking shows, and I love cooking for people. Come a barbeque, I'll be more than happy to cook.
17. One day in New York I ate Lamb over Rice for two consecutive meals. I felt like my stomach was being torn into shreds.
18. Once again into peer pressure, I joined DSP because all the cool kids were doing it, and felt the obligation to do so also.
19. One time a girl flashed me in third grade, I was shocked to see that she looked exactly the same as me under the hood.
20. When the Christmas claymation shows would come on with Rudolph the Red nose Reindeer, I used to be scared shitless from the Abominable Snowman.
21. I have this weird OCD where in my facebook all my details have to be in clean numbers. ie: photos of you: 500, tagged of you 450, friends 250, from nyu 175 etc etc.
22. I hate it when you're out eating and two people order the same dish. Dare to be different
23. Apparently from the consensus of others I have a voluptuous buttocks region. This puzzles me because where were all these comments years back. It didn't just appear, so I have a feeling that they are all liars wearing some weird butt-accentuating goggles.
24. I clogged my bathtub in my dorm room twice this year in a span of 6 days. I think my suitemate hates me. The first time was because I dropped my soap bottle cover into the drain and couldn't get it out. The second time was because the very cover that was put there to prevent blockages from happening again got stuck in the drain. You're welcome.
25. I used to have a rolley backpack in 6th grade, I think thats why I got turned down by a girl when I asked her out.

Upcoming Antcipation

Semester has been crazy, have had absolutely no time to sit down and just distance myself from everything and just stretch out. Is a good thing, is also a bad thing. Still shamelessly unemployed, still in the school grind. However, something big is in the mix, was in Brooklyn on the set to get some footage done.


Stay tuned, when I can get the time to get it all together get ready.